Yet again, I find myself linking to Smashing Magazine. This time, it’s their 50 Excellent Digital Photography Photoshop Tutorials. I’m usually a bit of a purist when it comes to digital photography, but I’ve been slowly—very, very slowly—coming around to appreciating the art of Photoshop enhancements. Most of the tutorials Smashing Magazine links to, though, err on the side of tasteful enhancements, not tacky crap. (This photo, for example, looks plausibly realistic, albeit maybe shot with a budget camera in the 70’s. But it’s really a more fitting mood than the drab original.)

Kind of like duct-taping a giant butcher’s knife to a Roomba, sometimes an awful idea pops into your head, and it’s just so ridiculous that you can’t let it go. Unlike the Roomba deathtrap, though, I actually went ahead with this one: Markov Chains meet some delicious holiday recipes. To make it clear where one ends and the next begins, I’ve unimaginatively labeled each. I’ll gladly take name suggestions in the comments section.

Recipe A:

Place the pastry-wrapped cheese seam-side down onto a baking sheet. Brush the pastry sheet at room temperature for 40 minutes or until eggs are set. Top with bread cubes and cheese. Mix picante sauce, eggs and milk and pour over all. Cover and refrigerate for 2 hours or overnight. 3. Bake uncovered at 350 degrees F for 45 minutes to 1 hour. 2. Preheat the oven to 500 degrees F for 45 minutes to 1 hour.

Recipe B:

Stir the cherries, pecans, honey and rosemary in a 10-inch skillet over medium heat, stirring frequently to break up meat. Pour off any excess flour. Heat the oven to 500 degrees F (260 degrees C). 2. Place potatoes in a roasting rack. Rub the meat can retain its juices. 1. Cook the sausage in a shallow container. Gently press the edges of the roast should be at 145 degrees F (150 degrees C), and continue roasting for 1 hour and 10 minutes, or until it’s easy to handle. Heat the oven to 500 degrees F for 25-30 minutes or until the pastry square.

Recipe C:

In a separate bowl, stir together mayonnaise, onion, and bacon. Gently stir into potatoes and cheese. Spread into a 14-inch square. Stir the cherries, pecans, honey and rosemary in a large bowl. While the potatoes are just soft. Drain, place in a shallow container. Gently press the edges to seal. Place the browned roast in a 2-quart shallow baking dish. Sprinkle with 3/4 cup cheese.

Recipe D:

Place the roast to rest for 10 or 15 minutes in the bowl of a food processor. Process until smooth. Transfer to slow cooker and scatter the celery and the garlic in the next eight ingredients. Pour into the pan to produce moist heat. Reduce oven temperature to 325 degrees F (260 degrees C). 4. Remove any plastic from roast, and place in a small bowl. Spread the mixture over the cheese. Fold the sides up onto the flour mixture to coat all sides.

Recipe E:

Let stand for 45 minutes or until the internal temperature of the apple, and the garlic in the preheated oven. Roast uncovered for 15 minutes in the next eight ingredients. Pour into the preheated oven. Pour water into the center of the cheese. Trim the remaining two sides of the pastry with the egg mixture. Fold two opposite sides of the cheese. Trim the remaining two sides of the pastry with the cheese and press the roast stand for 45 minutes to 1 hour. Serve with the egg and water in a small bowl. Spread the mixture over the cheese. Trim the remaining two sides of the roast, and place in a shallow container.

Enjoy!

McCain and Obama have both been the target of some idiotic news stories lately:

• Illinois Governor Blagojevich (everyone calls him “Blago” — I wonder if he has a blog, the Blagoblog?) and his attempts to sell Obama’s seat. How much was Obama involved? A full investigation! Off with his head! Oh, wait, the transcripts show Blago cursing Obama for being unwilling to join in the corruption, and Rahm ripping Blago a new one. Yeah, Blago’s pretty shady (though, as someone pointed out, people are presumed innnocent until proven guilty…Even if he is so obviously guilty), but the only link to Obama is that Obama’s denounced him and Blago has blasted Obama for not colluding with him.
• McCain can’t promise to support Palin in future runs for President. McCain’s campaign was marred by a series of horrible decisions and bizarre antics, among them picking someone less qualified than Joe the Plumber for the second-highest office in the nation. And after the election, Joe the Plumber lashed out at McCain and his “dishonest” campaign. So this is more of the same? Nope. For once, McCain isn’t making an impulsive decision, instead deciding to not unconditionally support someone in 2012 before anyone can even conjecture who might run.

I’m at the laundromat, which means I can wear clean clothes tomorrow. PSNH was near my neighborhood as we were leaving, and our answering machine just picked up when we called, suggesting that we’ve got power. This might mean that I can take a warm shower! I can’t ping our home gateway box, though, which means that our cable modem hasn’t come back. That makes sense, as we still don’t get cable TV, even with our TV and cable box hanging off the generator.

But even an unrepetent Internet addict like me values hot water over Internet. Then again, thanks to the iPhone, I only lost the Internet for about 12 hours until the local cell tower was brought back on the air.

Mr. T, are you guys dug out of the ice yet?

I was trying to think of a creative title, but failed. Between going to the dump every week, and having to shovel our driveway whenever it snows, my dad and I had discussed–more longingly than seriously–picking up a cheap pickup truck.

But eBay and Craigslist have shown that used bucket trucks–cherry pickers–are affordable enough. And there are myraid reasons they’d be handy for us, living in a rural area. For one, we have a lot of precarious tree limbs hanging. We could go up in the bucket with a chainsaw. It would also be handy for getting up onto the roof. As hams, it would make antenna service easy. And as a photographer, it’s be an awesome angle for taking aerial shots. Plus, bucket trucks are just cool. I suspect it’s something friends and neighbors would want to borrow, too. (Remember to draft up some paperwork waiving all liability first, though.)

So this is the second in my “what I want for Christmas” category. (The first, you may recall, is a fake moustache. The unspoken third, of course, is electricity.)

Thursday evening New Hampshire got hit by a tremendous ice storm. The lights flickered a few times, before we finally lost power after a transformer outside blew up.

We had enough hot water left for me to take a shower and go to work on Friday. In Boston, all was well. People were unaware that their neighbors to the north were frozen under ice.

A state of emergency has been declared. Governor Lynch claimed it as because it’s the biggest power outage in state history, with the power company suggesting it may take a week, and even that they’re not sure quite how just how many lost power. They have crews coming in from out of state: and Canada.

But I’m pretty sure it’s because my nearby cell tower is off the air, meaning that my Interet access is spotty at best. We have the generator and fireplace on, but without cable, no Internet access. And that, my friends, is a state of emergency.

I had mixed feelings on the auto bailout. We have to stop bailing everyone out after years of ineptitude. (Why has American auto failed to give us a hybrid that isn’t a gas-guzzling SUV?) And as far as Democrats go, I’m not terribly pro-union: they started to help get employees some basic rights, but I think they sometimes go too far.

There were lots of reasons not to bail out the industry. And the CEOs with their corporate jets and lack of a plan didn’t help.

But refusing to agree to the bailout because American employees make too much money? That’s a new one. And the claim that they make an average of $75 an hour? Have you ever seen Detroit? I’m not sure anyone there makes $150,000 a year. I am pretty sure, though, that there are a lot of people who don’t make $15,000 a year.

But at the end of the day, I’ve got my trusty Toyota. I just feel bad that Detroit is going from bad to worse, and that Congress has officially decreed that it doesn’t care.

Exchange + IMAP is a wonky-enough combination. But this?

I’m now quite sure that I know what I want for Christmas.

For anyone else who really likes awesome stuff, I’ve just discovered Uncrate, a seriously-awesome blog covering everything from the latest Bentley sedan to cool watches to designer vodka. The stuff on the front page right now is maybe some of the weaker content, but the magnet throwing stars, perfect for making visitors think that your fridge barely survived a ninja attack, are a much better example. Some is utterly impractical, like the $300,000 armored SUV, but others is utterly practical, like free software. And there’s plenty of in-between, like the $2,000 Ridley Vintage Motorbike.