I just updated PHP and Apache on this machine. Gentoo seems to have changed the way they do some things… But a few notes along the way, since there isn’t much in the way of helpful links out there…

• I kept getting this error:

  apache2: Could not reliably determine the server's fully qualified domain name, using 127.0.0.1 for ServerName
  No Listening Sockets Available, shutting down.
  Unable to open logs

  The usual suggestion with the “No listening sockets available” is that port 80 is being used by something else. Maybe Apache hasn’t actually shut down and you’re trying to restart it. However, in my case, I had made very certain that nothing was on port 80.

  The problem is actually caused by the fact that, after an upgrade, the “Listen” directive randomly goes missing. Tucking “Listen 80” into the top of a virtual host fixed everything.

• Keep backups of all your config files. I screwed up and let them be rewritten as I upgraded Apache.