A review of the Sunday comics…
- Dilbert: An employee needs to ask his VP a question, but is told he can’t talk directly to them. Rank: something slightly short of a smile.
- Opus: Too long to read.
- Get Fuzzy: one animal repeatedly throws rice and blasts the other in the face with an airhorn. Rank: slight grin.
- Ask Shagg: Facts about squid. With a joke about them playing ping-pong. Rank: less than a smile.
- Zits: Jeremy has fantasies about his guidance counselor. Because she’s female. Rank: shrug.
- Monty: Monty shares demotivational sayings with his parrot which has a motivational calendar. Rank: smile.
- For Better or Worse: The kids set their clocks back. One is shocked that his toy, broken within the hour, is still broken. Rank: eyeroll.
- Bizarre news story called “What is Innovations?” Not read because it’s not a comic, and because the grammar is abysmal.
- Curtis: A kid doesn’t do his homework and is honest. He gets sent to the principal’s office. Rank: sigh because it’s boring, and because no one goes to the principal’s office for not doing their homework.
- Mother Goose & Grimm: Two characters in prison, one remarks to the other, “I’m doing forty years to life. I swiped a $50,000 stapler from the Pentagon.” Rank: smile.
- Foxtrot: Too lame and complex to summarize. Rank: bleh.
- The Family Circus: the kid is counting nuts. “I’m making sure less than half of these nuts are peanuts,” he says. Rank: smile, because it’s something I’d do.
- Non Sequitur: It’s seven paragraphs of text. Skipping. Rank: F, for “Failed to even understand the assignment.”
- Rose is Rose: Some crazy lady confuses her with someone else. Rank: bleh. Might have been better if it was earlier in the comics.
- Adam at Home: Two people get each other’s business cards. Rank: Can I have my time back?
- Rhymes with Orange: Innovations in child care. Rank: Shrug. I’ve seen worse.
- F Minus: A kid turns 14. His friends gossip that he’s 13 but his parents are superstitious. Rank: It’s not an F minus, but it’s no A, either.
- Princess of Ai-land: Huh? Way too much to read. Rank: Didn’t even read it.
- Stone Soup: Someone says she hopes her daughter doesn’t end up in therapy. Lots of people in the bar say they’re in therapy. Rank: I thought comics were supposed to be funny?
- Arlo & Janis: The second comic about Daylight Savings Time. These ones joke, “I’d rather sleep late than go to bed early.” Rank: shrug. Which is becoming one of the highest compliments for a comic.
- Doonesbury: Someone asks someone else for $5K for a motorcycle. The other guy rambles about how unsafe motorcycles are. Rank: F, for “Failed to even try to be funny.”
- Zippy: I don’t even get this one. Rank: F-.
Conclusion: I’ve laughed more watching the Patriots in the first five minutes of the game. And nothing funny has happened. I thought comics were supposed to be funny.
- Dating over TCP
- A Tale of Two Apologies
- If I Controlled the News…